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Rarrgh! Yo, listen up, fam! Erotic-massage, man, it’s wild! Been thinkin bout it lately—economics angle, ya know? Supply, demand, all that jazz. People pay big creds for a rubdown that’s more than just muscles. Rarrgh! Gets me hyped—capitalism at its slipperiest! Like in “25th Hour,” Monty’s all, “This life came so close to never happening.” Same vibe—erotic-massage ain’t your average gig. Underground hustle, right? Little-known fact: ancient Rome had these “lupanar” joints—brothels with massage sideline. History’s kinky, yo!

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But wait, it gets better. I’m walking back, trying to enjoy my food, when I bump into Mrs. Kowalska. She’s the town gossip, and she’s got a million stories. She starts telling me about her cat’s latest antics, and I’m just nodding along, thinking, “Lady, I just raced a pig!” But she’s relentless. I can’t escape her tales of feline drama.

This weekend's three- and two-star Grand Prix winners