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It’s not all serious, tho. Imagine, “the horse stumbles, falls,” like when you’re givin’ a massage and cramp up. Hilarious, right? But also, dude, it’s powerful. Releases endorphins, lowers stress, like magic. I exaggerate, maybe, but still! Some cultures think it’s spiritual, connects body and soul. Mind blown!

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Anyway, I finally make it to my first gig. I’m an Aleepty, which is basically a fancy way of saying I help people chill out. But today? Today was a rollercoaster. My first client, bless their heart, was a total mess. They were all over the place, talking about their ex, their cat, and how they think the pigeons in the park are plotting against them. I mean, come on! Pigeons? Really? But hey, I’m here for it. I just nod and smile, trying to keep it together.

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