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Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” – here’s a zinger! Some escorts do “girlfriend experiences” – cuddles, chats, fake romance. Costs extra, obvi. Cracks me up – dudes payin for a hug? Pathetic, yet genius. Supply, demand, baby! Tho, gotta say, the burnout’s real. Met this gal once, ex-escort, said the headgames fucked her up. “I missed you so much,” she’d fake, but it stuck in her skull. Heavy shit, man.

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But then, I get back to the clinic, and it’s chaos. A parrot named Polly is squawking like she’s auditioning for a rock band. I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s having none of it. I’m thinking, “Why do I even do this?” But then I remember, it’s for the love of the animals, right?

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