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About Poznan

So, check this—last week, I’m on a case, guy says he "slipped" at a motel. Yeah, right! Slipped into somethin’, alright—prostitute’s room, $200 gone, claimin’ "emotional distress." I’m like, “Buddy, you’re distressed? I’m distressed!” I’m rantin’, pacin’, thinkin’—this jerk’s milkin’ the system! Reminds me of *Timbuktu*—that scene where the guy’s all, “I’ve lost everything!” Yeah, pal, cry me a river, you lost your dignity first!

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Tomek starts talking about his latest game idea, and I’m like, “Bro, that’s genius!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my coffee all over my laptop. I’m like, “NOOO!” My heart sank. I’m pretty sure I yelled something dramatic like, “Why, Tuszyn, why?”

This Polish town thinks Winnie the Pooh is too scantily dressed to be around children