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Lemme drop a lil’ factoid—didya know escorts been around since forever? Ancient Rome had ‘em—called ‘em “lupae,” wolf-girls, cos they howled for clients. Wild, right? Probs made toga parties lit! Imaginin’ that cracks me up—some senator, drunk, yellin’, “Where’s my wolf-girl at?” Ha! *Toni Erdmann* vibes again—“It’s all absurd, but real.” Love that.
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First off, I hit up ul. Główna for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my latte, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 5-layer caramel macchiato with extra foam. Seriously? Who even drinks that? I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, not witness a coffee art competition.
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