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I tried it once – “D’oh!” – total disaster, man! Matched with this babe, thought I’d be all smooth, like, “Your eyes undo me,” quotin the movie, ya know? She’s like, “WTF, dude?” and I’m sittin there, eatin donuts, feelin like a loser. Fun fact: back in the 90s, sex-datin was all phone lines – ya called, got freaky, no pics! Imagine that crap, no filters, just voice – “D’oh!” – scary as hell!

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this old dude feeding ducks. He’s got this whole bag of bread, and the ducks are going nuts. I mean, it was kinda funny, but also, like, dude, save some for the rest of us! I laughed, though. It was a nice little moment.

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