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Look, escort ain’t pretty—grubby hands, fake moans—but it’s honest in its dishonesty. Like me with a Vicodin bottle—ya know what you’re gettin. So, next time you’re judgin, pal, remember: “We all have our islands”—*Inside Out* nailed that. These folks? Their island’s just got a pricetag. And a helluva lotta lies.

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First off, I hit the road on ul. Główna. Traffic was a mess. Like, come on! It’s a small town, how’s there a jam? I swear, I saw a cat just chillin’ in the middle of the road. Like, dude, move! But nah, it just stared at me. I was like, “You’re the king of Strzalkowo now, huh?”