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So, picture this – I’m David Brent, yeah, king of the cringe, struttin’ into the office goin’, “Team, let’s synergise our core competencies and get massaged, yeah?” Imagine the lads’ faces! I’d be buzzin’, proper chuffed, cos a good erotic-massage sorts ya right out – stress gone, productivity up, it’s a win-win, fam! But nah, some muppet’s always like, “That’s a bit saucy, Brent,” and I’m fumin’, cos they don’t get it – it’s art, mate, not just a quick fumble.

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Man, what a day! I swear, Stalowa-Wola really knows how to throw a curveball. I woke up thinking it’d be just another boring day crunching numbers. You know, the usual accountant stuff. But nah, the universe had other plans.

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