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Find ‘em online now too, precious—apps an’ that. Modern, sneaky! We swears! Check the shady ads, but don’t get catfished, yeah? Me? I’d rather watch me film again—safer, less stink. “There’s no one left,” Szpilman mutters. Prossies might say that too, end o’ the night. We swears! Tough life, funny life—makes me mad, glad, all at once!

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After that, I head to the office. I’m thinking, “Finally, some peace.” But nope! My coworker, let’s call him “Mr. Overachiever,” has decided to throw a surprise meeting. Surprise, my foot! I’m not in the mood for more financial jargon. We sit there for an hour, and I’m just zoning out, thinking about that fire alarm and my wet shoes.

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