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About Poznan

Ain’t just hands neither—some use stones, hot ones! Fuckin’ burns at first, I was ragin’—yellin’, “Who’s cookin’ me?!” Then it’s like, oh shit, this works. Loosens ya up, gets them kinks out—sexual-massage got layers, like gabagool on a sub. Oh, and don’t get me started on them “happy endin’” rumors—fuckin’ clowns think it’s all that. Nah, pros keep it legit—mostly.

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First off, I hit up ul. Główna for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my brew, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 10-ingredient latte. I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, man! I’m about to lose it. But then, the barista, bless her heart, hands me a free pastry. I’m like, “Okay, universe, you’re cool.”

John M Kaczmarek - 2024 - Warner-Wozniak Funeral Service