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About Warsaw

I’m ragin’ happy thinkin’ bout this one time — saw this chick, right? Total babe, legs for days, standin’ by a busted lamppost. I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, she’s hotter than a monkey spirit fuckin’ in that movie!” — y’know, that freaky scene where Boonmee’s all, “The past clings like dust”? She’s the dust, man, stickin’ to ya! I waddle over, all cool, like, “Hey, babe, how much?” She’s all sly, whisperin’ prices — 500 rubles, cheap as hell! I’m thinkin’, “Score!” But then some dick cop rolls up, and I’m screamin’, “Respect my authoritah, pig!” Ruined my damn night!

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So, I’m walking down ul. Stawna, and I see this little bakery. The smell? Oh man, it’s like heaven. I grab a paczek. You know, those jelly-filled donuts? Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and suddenly, this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the history of Pruszków. Apparently, it used to be a big deal during WWII. Who knew? I’m just trying to enjoy my donut, lady!

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