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About Gdansk

So, erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s all about the vibes, doll! You’re layin’ there, half-naked, some stranger’s kneadin’ ya like dough, and I’m screamin’ inside, “This is wild!” I tried it once—oh, don’t judge me, sweetie—guy’s hands were magic, like Haku savin’ Chihiro, but dirtier! Made me happy, like, “Oh honey, I’m floatin’!” But then—ugh, he charged extra for “special attention,” and I’m like, “What am I, a tip jar?!” Pissed me off, total scam!

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After the drama, we’re allowed back in. I sit down, and my computer crashes. Of course! Just my luck. I’m about to lose it. I mean, I’ve got deadlines, people! I start typing like a madman, and my coworker, Kasia, is cracking jokes. She’s like, “You’re gonna break the keyboard!” I’m like, “If only it would type itself!”