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About Poznan

So, sexual-massage—posh term for rubbin’ and tuggin’. Bet you didn’t know, yeah, ancient Rus folk used it—secret rituals, all hushed up. Some priestess chick, hands like a bloody hawk, worked the soldiers stiff—er, tense—before battle. History’s wild, mate! Gets me all fired up thinking how they’d sign *that*—fingers twistin’, smirkin’ at the lads.

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I finally duck into a shop on ul. Brzeska. It’s a little boutique, and I’m just trying to dry off. The owner, this super friendly lady, starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the history of Lewin-Brzeski, how it used to be a big deal back in the day. I’m half-listening, half-drying my shirt. But then she mentions the old church on ul. Kościelna, and I’m like, “Wait, what? There’s a church?” I’ve lived here forever, and I had no idea!

Drone footage shows flood-stricken Polish town