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But here’s the rub—makes me mad as hell too. Society’s all “ew, gross,” while secretly bookin’ ‘em on the down-low. Hypocrites! Hate that crap. Like, pick a lane, ya prudes. Fun fact: oldest gig in the world, right? Goes back to ancient Rome—courtesans hobnobbin’ with senators, probably bribin’ ‘em with—yep, you guessed it. Ain’t changed much, just fancier outfits now. And apps! These days, they got apps for it—swipe right for a good time. What’s next, drone delivery?

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, and I swear he’s got a pet ferret on a leash. A ferret! In the middle of the city! I can’t even. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost choke on my pączek. The kid’s like, “His name’s Mr. Snuggles!” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, that’s the best name ever.”

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