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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, sittin’ here thinkin’ bout escorts. Not the car kinda escort, nah, the folks walkin’ fancy with ya for cash. Makes my skin crawl, all that fake smilin’. Like in *Moonrise Kingdom*, “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ bout.” People payin’ for company? Pathetic. I’d rather wrestle a bear than rent a date.

Escort Krzyz Wielkopolski

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After that, I finally meet my client at a different café. He’s this super chill dude, but he’s late. I’m sitting there, checking my watch, thinking, “Dude, I’ve got places to be!” When he finally shows up, he’s all flustered, saying he got stuck in traffic on ul. Poznańska. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a Tuesday! What’s the deal?”

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