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But then—oh glory!—I stumble on a gem. Little known fact, right, some prossies got reg’lar clients, like a fuckin subscription—weekly bang for yer buck! This one chick, mate, she’s got a flat near Soho, proper discreet. Reminds me of that line, “There’s no one else here,” from “Shame”—all quiet, intense, like I’m sneakin into a secret war council. She’s fit, too—curves like the hills of bloody Kent! I’m chuffed to bits, heart poundin like a drumroll at Dunkirk.

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So, I woke up late, as usual. My alarm? Totally failed me. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever I could find—probably the same shirt I wore yesterday. Classic me, right? Anyway, I rushed outta my flat on ul. Główna, and let me tell ya, the weather was all over the place. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s like the sky’s crying. Typical Kozuchów, I guess.

Fig. 1. Kożuchów, the town hall and adjacent, stall-based tenement...