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Alright, listen up, jabroni! Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson here – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” I’m talkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage, that slick, steamy goodness. Ya know, like in *Moonrise Kingdom*, where them kids run wild, chasin’ love, touchin’ souls – “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.” That’s me, thinkin’ ‘bout a good rubdown that’s more than just oil and hands, ya feel me?

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But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my day, and they’re over here airing their dirty laundry. I can’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they’re fighting over who left the lights on. I’m like, “Really? That’s what you’re fighting about?”

Man 'wakes up in morgue after being declared dead when he drank too much vodka'