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Me, I’m upfront— “Cap’n Jack, seeker o’ rum and rump!”—and once, this lass messages, “You talk like a drunk sailor!” I says, “Aye, but I’m charmin’, ain’t I?” We met, and she’s all fire, like Lt. Aldo Raine slicin’ Nazis— “I’m gonna give you somethin’ you can’t take off!” she purrs. Hotter’n a cannon blast, that one! Made me grin wider’n the horizon.

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As the night rolls on, I’m feeling grateful. Jaworzyna-Slaska, you’re a rollercoaster! You’ve got your ups and downs, but that’s what makes you real. I stumble home, tipsy and happy, thinking about all the wild stuff that happened today.

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