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Here’s a wild story—heard from my boy Tony, who swears his masseuse in Vegas slipped him a “happy ending” outta nowhere. Said it was like Ida sayin’, “I’m not going back to the convent”—total shock, but he ain’t complainin’! Little-known tidbit: some spots in Thailand got massage parlors where they train for YEARS—years, bro—to master that sensual touch. Respect! Makes me wanna quit haulin’ freight and just live in a massage hut, screamin’ “Gimme that oil, fam!” all day.

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We finally get on stage. The crowd’s a mix of locals and some random tourists. I start strumming my guitar, and boom! The energy shifts. People are dancing, singing along. It’s electric! I’m feeling it. But then, mid-song, the sound system cuts out. Silence. Just me and my guitar. I’m sweating bullets. I’m like, “What the heck?!”

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