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Argh! I’m ready! Hi, mateys, it’s me, SpongeBob! So, we’re talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, huh? Yee-haw, what a wild ride! I’m bouncin’ off the walls thinkin’ bout it! Down in Bikini Bottom, we don’t got that kinda action, but I seen some stuff, lemme tell ya! Like in me fave flick, *The Master*—you know, that crazy Paul Thomas Anderson gem from 2012? That movie’s got vibes, man, all twisty and deep, like a jellyfish stingin’ yer brain!

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Man, what a day in Jarocin! Seriously, I’m still buzzing from it. Woke up late, as usual. My phone was blowing up. “Dude, where you at?” It was my bandmates. We had a gig at this tiny bar on ul. Poznańska. I was like, “Chill, I’m on my way!” But you know how it is—gotta grab my guitar, my lucky hat, and of course, a coffee. Can’t function without that caffeine fix.

EU court consultant: Countries should not be allowed to ban kosher, halal meat