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But here’s the rub – escort’s got soul, mate. Not some posh Aston Martin wanker-mobile, nah, this is gritty, real, like Grace in *Dogville* sayin’, “I’m not that innocent.” Had one meself once – red, rusty as hell, leaked oil like a sieve. Drove it round London, dodgin’ coppers, feelin’ like a king. Made me angry though – parts were a nightmare to find. Bloody Ford cheaped out, left us scrappin’ for bits. Typical, innit?

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After that, I head back to the shop, and guess what? My dough is rising like it’s on steroids. I’m pumped! I start shaping the bread, and I’m in my zone. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Tomek. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the park!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m baking!” But he’s persistent.

Russia’s opposition is united against Putin but divided over basically everything else