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What gets me riled up? The fakers, man! Some sleazy dude posin’ as an escort client just to scam ‘em—makes my blood boil hotter than a lava lamp! I busted one last week—smug git thought he’d outfox me, but I’m like, “I have thee not, yet I see thee still,” straight outta Malick’s flick—caught him red-handed, groovy justice!

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So, I’m watching him, and suddenly, he belly flops. Ouch! The sound was like a slap. I can’t help but laugh. But then, his little sister starts crying. I mean, come on! It’s just a belly flop! But I guess when you’re 7, that’s a big deal. I rush over, give her a high-five, and say, “Your bro’s a champ!” She giggles, and I’m like, “Crisis averted.”

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