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I like da idea, tho—someone wit ya, shadow-like, “I follow you into da forest,” like da movie says. But real talk, escort can be dodgy. Some get scammed—pay big, get nada. Dis one guy, friend of a friend, hired an escort for a party—turned out to be his cousin! Ha! Awkward as heck, he was red like borscht! Me, I’d rather stick to minions—dey dumb, but dey mine.

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Around noon, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the park by ul. Słowackiego. It’s so pretty there! The trees are all green, and there’s this cute little pond. I sit on a bench, just trying to breathe. And then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by with a dog. The dog jumps on me, all excited. I’m like, “Whoa, buddy! Personal space!” But then I start petting it, and it’s all good vibes.

Czołg na ulicach Pajęczna. Pijany kierowca zatrzymany przez policję