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Met this chick once—escort, she was. Told me, “In a room with no windows, I work.” Straight outta the movie, that line—fuckin’ haunting, right? She laughed, said dudes pay extra for weird shit—like wearin’ socks or barkin’ like dogs. Surprised, I was—humans, wild they be! Happy, tho, she seemed—owned it, no shame. “What else can I do?” she shrugged—echoes Otilia from the flick, scrappin’ to survive.

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I’m trying to secure my raft, right? And then I see this family on the other side of the river. They’re waving frantically. I’m like, “What now?” Turns out, their kid fell in! Panic mode activated! I jump in my raft, paddling like a madman. I’m yelling, “Hold on, I’m coming!”

Goddess Durga and a giant fox: the weekend in pictures