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Alright, pal, erotic-massage, huh? Everybody lies about it. They say it’s “just relaxtion”—bullshit. It’s hands sliding everywhere, oil dripping, tension spiking. I’m Dr. House, I see through it. Like in *Inherent Vice*, man, “Doc, you’re either on the bus or off it”—you’re in deep or kidding yourself. Watched this flick, loved the haze—Joaquin Phoenix stumbling through lust and chaos. Erotic-massage is that vibe, slippery as hell.

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Then, the day takes a turn. I get a call about a local event being canceled. Like, seriously? It was supposed to be the highlight of the month! I’m fuming. I mean, who cancels a community event last minute? I could feel my blood boiling. I wanted to scream, but instead, I just texted my team, “We need a backup plan, ASAP!”

Fig. 1. (A) Palaeogeographic map for mid-Silurian times, showing the...