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Me? I dig it, kinda. Relaxes the armor, y’know? Tense from all that rebel crap. Watched *The Headless Woman*—fuckin’ Lucrecia Martel, genius. “What have I done?” she says. Same vibe after a shady massage—guilt hits hard. You’re floatin’, then bam, “Did I just pay for that?” Surprised me how deep it goes—hands on skin, power shifts. Not just horny dudes either—ladies, too, droppin’ creds.

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Then, outta nowhere, my colleague Sarah walks in. She’s got this huge grin on her face. Turns out, she just got back from a trip to the Waikanae Estuary. She’s raving about the birdlife and how she saw a rare bittern. I’m like, “That’s cool, but I need power!” But I can’t help but smile at her excitement.

'My mum thought it was disgusting': The 'polarising' Kiwiana-inspired pie