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About Tauranga

Dude, so I’m thinkin bout findin a prostitute, right? Whoa. Like, it’s wild out there, man. Streets buzzin, shady corners callin—kinda reminds me of *The Assassination of Jesse James*. That slow burn, ya know? “Every man’s got his burden,” Jesse’d say. Heavy shit. Anyway, I’m scrollin X, lookin for leads—bam, profiles poppin up. Some chick’s postin pics, all sultry, like, “available now, hit me.” Whoa. I’m analyzin her vibe—real or scam? Can’t tell yet.

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So, I roll up, and it’s packed! I see all these locals, and it’s a vibe. I grab some fresh apples from this old lady. She’s got the best stories, man. She tells me about the time she met a kiwi bird. I’m like, “No way!” But she’s serious. I’m laughin’ and thinkin’, “Only in Vogeltown!”

A funny thing happened on the way up Fortunatus St