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Hey y’all, Dr. Phil here, reckon I’m a Clinical Research Specialist now, huh? Talkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage today – lordy, what a topic! So, sexual-massage, it’s all ‘bout mixin’ them sensual vibes with kneadin’ them muscles. How’s that workin’ for ya? Lemme tell ya, it’s wild! Been diggin’ into this, and shoot, it’s old as dirt – think ancient China, them Taoist folks usin’ it for healin’ *and* gettin’ frisky. Ain’t that a hoot?

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Finally, we get the all-clear, and I head home. I’m exhausted but happy. Te-Hapara, you crazy little town, you never fail to surprise me. I plop down on my couch, ready to binge-watch something mindless. But then I remember the fish and chips. I forgot to eat them! Ugh, what a day.

Students perform at Turanganui Schools Cultural Festival