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About Auckland

Now, lemme tell ya, I was shocked—SHOCKED—when I heard ‘bout this one spot in Amsterdam where they got prostitutes in windows like they shoppin’ for shoes! I’m like, “Halleluyer, what’s next?!” You stroll by, pick one out—ain’t that a trip? Me, I’d be too busy sassin’ ‘em, like, “Girl, you need a sandwich, not a john!” Haha, I crack myself up! But real talk, it’s a hustle—sad, funny, and wild all at once. “Everything’s gone to ruin,” like in the movie, but these gals keep on pushin’.

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First off, I had a booking at this fancy place on Cuba St. You know, the one with the neon lights and all the hipsters? Yeah, that one. I was all dressed up in my kimono, feeling like a total queen. But then, I stepped outside, and bam! Rain. Like, outta nowhere. I’m talking torrential downpour. Ugh! My hair was frizzing up like a poodle on a bad hair day.

Pedestrian hit by bus near Wellington’s Te Aro Park