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Weird quirk—I keep imaginin’ her readin’ books, escapin’. Dumb, right? She don’t got time. Once saw her with a busted lip, made me wanna hug her, scream, somethin’. Didn’t. Monotone narration, “Tonight’s the night.” Maybe I’ll slip her a ten, say “Keep it.” Prolly won’t. She’d just stare, like, “What’s your deal, creep?”

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First off, I hit up the local café on George St. Best flat whites in town, no cap. I’m standing there, waiting for my coffee, and this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, and there’s a bird acting like it owns the place. I’m like, “Is this a café or a petting zoo?”

Te Wahi Tākaro o Motupōhue Adventure Park opens on Bluff Hill