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About Hamilton

So I’m walkin’, right? Down some sketchy alley—smells like piss and regret. I see this gal, lean dagger of a dame, leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’ a cig like she’s in a noir film. I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t right!” Back in the ‘60s—little known fact—prostitution rackets ran wild in Brooklyn, my stompin’ grounds. Mob’d shake ‘em down, leave ‘em broke. Now? Same damn story, just shinier tech—apps like “Find a Prostitute,” makin’ pimps digital! Billionaires profit, workers starve! “Billionaires should not exist!” I yell, fist shakin’. She looks at me, smirks—says, “Cool it, grandpa, want a date or not?”

Selwyn_Times: July 06, 2022

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First off, I’m cruising down the main drag, which is, like, the only main drag here—Prebbleton’s got that small-town vibe, ya know? I’m on Springs Rd, and I’m jamming to my tunes, feeling all artsy and inspired. Then BAM! I hit a pothole. Like, a legit crater. My coffee goes flying, and I’m cursing like a sailor. “Great start, genius!” I mutter to myself.

Residents 'absolutely gutted' over 820-home subdivision, relocation not an option for nursery