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Weirdest thing? Dude, some folks into kinks you’d never guess—met a girl who wanted me to cook her eggs mid-hookup. I’m like, “I make stoves, not omelets, tf?” Laughed my ass off, but it was kinda dope, lowkey. Sex-dating’s a gamble, fam—sometimes you win, sometimes you’re dodgin’ weirdos. “Truth is pain,” like the movie says, and the truth? Half these profiles lyin’ harder than my ex.
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So, I rush over to the local market on Howick’s main drag. I’m looking for the best leather. I’m sweating bullets, and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have a heart attack from all this running around. I grab some leather from this stall, and the guy tries to upsell me. “This is premium stuff!” he says. I’m thinking, “Yeah, mate, but my budget’s not premium.”
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