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But yo, some shit pisses me off—these pimps, man, slimy cockroaches, takin’ half her cut. Makes me wanna pull the trigger, y’know? Say hello to my little friend! I’d blast ‘em, but nah, I’m chill tonight. She hops in, smells like cheap perfume and danger—perfect. We talk, she’s tellin’ me ‘bout this one john who paid in gold teeth. GOLD TEETH, man! What’s this world comin’ to? Cracked me up, fuckin’ hilarious.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Commerce St. You know, the one with the best flat whites? I’m standing in line, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 10-ingredient smoothie. I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, and this guy’s over here making a science project. I’m like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a health convention!”

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