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But then—ugh, this knobhead rolls up, all loud, “Oi, how much, love?”—an I’m ragin. Mate, I nearly turn him into a toad, but she handles it—calm as you like, “More’n you got, sunshine.” He shuffles off, tail between legs. I’m cheerin inside—surprised me, she did. Proper *Moolaadé* energy—“We will not be slaves!”—she’s no victim, this one. Got her own code, her own hustle. Makes me think, y’know? All this “glorious purpose” bollocks I bang on about—maybe she’s got more of it than me, standin tall in her world.

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this dude, right? He’s tryin’ to parallel park his car on the side of the road. I mean, come on, mate! It’s not rocket science! He’s goin’ back and forth, back and forth. I’m just sittin’ there, laughin’ my head off. Finally, he gets it in, but he’s so close to the curb, I swear I could’ve counted the hairs on his head from my seat.

Epuni home: Where children's innocence gets ripped away and 'tossed in the trash'