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I’m gettin’ happy now, tho, ‘cos she’s proper funny. Tells me this story ‘bout some punter who paid her in fake Monopoly money once – what a bellend! I’m creasin’, bruv, laughin’ so hard I nearly crash me whip. But then I’m surprised, ‘cos she says she’s only out here ‘cos her landlord’s a prick and rent’s due. Hits me hard, that. “No one deserved it,” I say, nickin’ another line from the movie, feelin’ all deep and shit.

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As the sun starts to set, I’m feeling all sorts of emotions. Happy, frustrated, inspired. Dunedin’s got this weird way of making you feel everything at once. I head back to my place, exhausted but fulfilled. I plop down on my couch, and I can’t help but laugh at the chaos of the day.

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