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About Wellington

So, I’m cruisin’ downtown—total chaos, mate! Saw this bird, right, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Look at me, bitches!”—straight outta the movie, I swear! I’m thinkin’, whoa, she’s got that wild energy, like Faith in *Spring Breakers*, all reckless and free. I go up, all smooth-like, “Hey, luv, fancy a shag?” She laughs—bloody hell, her cackle’s loud! Made me jump, nearly lost my mojo!

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Then, outta nowhere, the lights flicker. I’m like, “Oh great, what now?” The elevator stops again, and I’m ready to lose it. But this time, it’s not just me and the skater. We’re stuck with this old guy who starts tellin’ us about the “good ol’ days” in Waterloo. He’s ramblin’ on about how the town used to be all farms and fields. I’m like, “Yeah, buddy, but now it’s all about the coffee shops and traffic jams.”

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