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About Wellington

Me? I tried it once – don’t judge, ya nosy git! Was in dis shady parlor, dim lights, smellin’ like lavender and sin. Lady says, “Relax, big boy,” and I’m like, “Vhat, me? Da Gru?!” Hands on me back, den lower – Lightbulb! – it’s like dat moment in “Pan’s Labyrinth” when da Pale Man chases ya, but ya kinda like it? Freaky, da! Felt good, tho – real good. Muscles all soft, head spinnin’, but den – bam! – she asks fer extra cash. Pissed me off, greedy minion! I’m yellin’, “I’m no cash cow, lady!” Stormed out, still smellin’ like her fancy oil.

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So, I ducked into the visitor center. It’s pretty cool inside, all modern and stuff. But then, I overheard this group of tourists. They were like, “Waitangi? Is that in Australia?” I almost choked on my coffee. I mean, really? Get a map, people! It’s like saying New York is in Canada. Ugh, I was so annoyed.

Regulatory Standards Bill claim accepted for urgency by Waitangi Tribunal with 12,000 claimants signed on