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Little secret—did ya know sex-dating apps track yer every swipe? Sellin’ yer horny soul to ads, sneaky bastards! We hates it! Makes us wanna smash me phone, dance on the bits! But—hah—sometimes it’s gold. Met this one bird, wild hair, sex was bonkers—felt like “a gesture, a scream” from the movie! Left me grinning, knackered, thinkin’ maybe it’s not all shite.

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Then, I get a call. One of the inmates’ family members is outside, causing a scene. Great. Just what I need. I rush back, and there’s this woman yelling about her son’s “unfair treatment.” I’m like, “Lady, he’s in prison for a reason!” But she’s not having it. I try to explain, but she’s just going off. I’m thinking, “Can I get a break, please?”

Body found in search for jetskier seen struggling on Lake Taupō