Lila Saint Johns Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

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Now, I ain’t sayin’ I’m no expert—lord knows I’d prob’ly trip over the massage table, knock the oil everywhere, make a dang mess. But there’s somethin’ mighty fine ‘bout that touch, all deliberate ‘n’ steamy. Gets ya feelin’ alive, even if the planet’s crashin’ down like in my fave flick. “There’s nothing to do,” they say in *Melancholia*, but shoot, I’d beg to differ—get a sexual-massage, darlin’! Best dang rebellion ‘gainst the end times.

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Then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get any weirder, I got a call from my boss. Apparently, there was a mix-up with the soil samples I sent in. They were supposed to be tested for pH levels, but they ended up testing for something else entirely. I was fuming! Like, how does that even happen?

Bus stop death: Teen's murder charge; father mourns 'kind' son; tearful vigil at scene