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Ya gotta be sharp, tho—cops everywhere, sting ops, ugh. One time, saw a guy get nabbed—thought he was slick, nope! “The intelligence is wrong!”—that’s me yellin’ in my head, watchin’ him flop. Me? I’m too clever, doc—zig when they zag. Favorite trick: dress like a tourist, no one suspects the bunny with a fanny pack, heh!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trippin’ over his own feet. He falls right in front of me, and I’m like, “Whoa, dude, you okay?” He looks up, grins, and says, “I’m fine! Just practicing my parkour!” I can’t help but laugh. Kids are wild, man.

Jesse Mulligan: This Parnell spot is the best Japanese restaurant you’ve never heard of