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About Christchurch

Lemme tell ya, findin’ a prossie ain’t no picnic. Ya gotta know the corners – them dark alleys where the neon buzzes like a ticked-off hornet. I seen one gal, legs longer’n a country mile, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owned it. “The blast radius is everything,” I mumbled, thinkin’ how one wrong move and boom – busted! Made me madder’n a wet hen when she sassed me, actin’ all high n’ mighty. I’m like, “Honey, I’m the law, not yer sugar daddy!”

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After lunch, I had to head back to the clinic. But guess what? I took a wrong turn on Te Horo Beach Rd. I ended up at the beach! Like, what even? I’m supposed to be working, not sunbathing! But the waves were calling my name. So, I parked and just sat there for a bit. The sound of the ocean? Pure therapy.

In just one month, this small town faced $80k of damage to public toilets