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I rememba dis one time – true story, swear on my minions! Dis chick, she send me foto, all naked-like, but it’s blurry, like Doc Sportello’s brain on dope! I’m like, “Vhat is dis? Art project?” She say, “No, just bad camera.” Lightbulb! Dat’s sex-dating for ya – half da time you don’t even know vhat u gettin’! Made me laugh so hard, I choke on my vodka.

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After the jam, I decide to stroll down to the Newlands Shopping Centre. I’m feeling good, got my tunes in my head. But then, I see this massive traffic jam on the main road. Cars honking, people yelling. I’m like, “What’s the deal?” Turns out, some dude’s car broke down right on the roundabout. Classic Newlands, right?

Indies Introduce Q&A with Tom Newlands