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So I’m trackin’ this “find a prostitute” mess—phone pings, blurry CCTV, the works. Guy’s sweatin’ when I call him out. “The guilt consumes!” I growl, quotin’ Haneke, and he’s shakin’ like a leaf. I’m lovin’ it—power trip, baby! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s my story! Unleash the power within, fam—don’t let these clowns fool ya! Catch ‘em, crush ‘em, laugh ‘em off—that’s the Tony way!

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After the race, I head to the pub on Gladstone Rd. Gotta celebrate, right? I walk in, and the place is packed. Everyone’s shoutin’, laughin’, and I’m just tryin’ to grab a drink. I order a cold one, and the bartender’s like, “You’re the jockey, right? Nice ride today!” I’m like, “Yeah, thanks, mate!” But inside, I’m thinkin’, “Dude, I just survived a seagull attack and my ex!”

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