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About Tauranga

Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prossie, right! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – it’s a bleedin mess out there. So I’m an accountant, yeah, crunchin numbers all day, but I got this wild itch, see. Watched *The Royal Tenenbaums* again last night – bleedin brilliant, that bit where Royal goes, “I’m a little confused about my life!” – and I’m thinkin, that’s me lookin for a prossie! Total chaos, mate.

What are you looking for?

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this dude, right? He’s tryin’ to parallel park his car on the side of the road. I mean, come on, mate! It’s not rocket science! He’s goin’ back and forth, back and forth. I’m just sittin’ there, laughin’ my head off. Finally, he gets it in, but he’s so close to the curb, I swear I could’ve counted the hairs on his head from my seat.

Wellington’s Epuni Street to be corrected to properly honour ancestor