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My quirk? I overthink everything. Like, right now, I’m wonderin’, what if the prostitute’s a better person than me? What if she’s kinder, smarter? Freaks me out, man. But also, what if she’s just doin’ it to pay rent, like anyone else? “How’s that workin’ for ya?” Not great, probably.

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But then, as I’m waiting, this dude walks in. He’s got this wild hair, like he just got outta a wind tunnel. And he starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s Norway. It’s cold. We get it. But he’s going on and on about how it’s the “perfect weather for a hike.” I’m just standing there, latte in hand, thinking, “Dude, chill. It’s not that deep.”