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About Sandnes

Alright, folks, lemme tell ya—sexual-massage, huh? What’s the deal with that? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—like, real slow—how’s it feel? Slippery hands, dim lights, some poor sap’s like, “This is my job now?” Hah! Me, I’m a Forester, sure, but I’m picturin’ this—trees swayin’, breeze hittin’ ya, then bam, someone’s rubbin’ your back with oil! Weird combo, right?

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Lars. He’s at the beach, sending me pics of him chilling with a beer. I’m like, “Lars, you’re killing me!” But then I remember, it’s Stavern. The beach is just a stone’s throw away. I could be there, soaking up the sun instead of dealing with Mr. Yelling.

Boerne officer Michele Van Stavern out of the hospital after being hit by car