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So, picture this—me, hulkin’ frame, comin’ off a ridge, knackered, some lass in a village says, “Bane, try this sexual-massage thing.” I’m like, what? You rubbin’ me up for a laugh? But she’s serious—hands on ya, not just kneadin’ knots, but wakin’ somethin’ wild. It’s no joke—growling, “You merely adopted the dark,” I felt it, that edge, like starin’ into a crevasse. Ain’t just ‘bout feelin’ good, it’s ‘bout power, release, like Saul draggin’ through hell, “No one can save us.”

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Then, outta nowhere, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I fall right into the grass, and this old lady walking by just cackles. I can’t help but laugh too. Like, what a sight! An agronomist face-planting in Sarpsborg.

Full coverage of KFUM Oslo vs Sarpsborg 08 game on Monday 21st of April at 15:00 including match guide, data analysis, probability analysis, standings, previous meetings and form guide.