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Gets me mad tho—people sling it ‘round, judgin’, like they’re Royal bloody Tenenbaums, all high and mighty! “We’re not regular people!” they’d say. Pfft, hypocrites! Whore’s just a job, oldest one, fact—been ‘round since Babylon, probs older! Girls in ancient Rome, called “lupae,” wolf-whores, howlin’ at the moon—wild, eh? Made me giggle, picturin’ ‘em, snarlin’ and sexy!

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But then, as I’m waiting, this dude walks in. He’s got this wild hair, like he just got outta a wind tunnel. And he starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s Norway. It’s cold. We get it. But he’s going on and on about how it’s the “perfect weather for a hike.” I’m just standing there, latte in hand, thinking, “Dude, chill. It’s not that deep.”