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Now, lemme rant—modern day, it’s all hush-hush. People whisperin’, “Oh, I got an erotic-massage.” Why you whisperin’? Own it! I’d be yellin’ it! “Yeah, I got rubbed down, so what?” But nah, society’s all prude—makes me mad! Like, lighten up! Meanwhile, I’m over here, googlin’ it—did ya know there’s “techniques”? Like, legit moves—tantric this, sensual that. Blew my mind! Thought it was just slappin’ oil on and callin’ it a day. Nope! There’s trainin’! I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ Joaquin Phoenix in *The Master*, all intense, goin’, “What’s your technique, huh? Process it!” Hilarious!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m scrambling to cover my gear. Fauske weather, am I right? One minute it’s sunny, the next you’re drenched. I’m standing there, soaked to the bone, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, what else could go wrong?

Northern Norway Railway to Tromsø ‘Too Expensive’