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About Almere

Lemme drop a gem—did ya know, back in the day, Paris had these secret “gleaner” hookups? Like, prostitutes would signal with flowers, lowkey as hell. History’s wild, yo. I’m picturin’ her now, leanin’ on a wall, smirkin’ like, “You ain’t ready.” Surprised me, fam—she quoted *The Gleaners*, like, “What’s waste to you is gold to me.” I’m shook! This chick’s deep, playin’ my soul like a mixtape.

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So, we decide to walk along the river. The Waal is looking pretty nice today. I mean, it’s Zaltbommel, right? The view is killer. But then, I see this group of kids throwing rocks into the water. I’m all for fun, but I’m like, “What if they hit a boat?” I’m not ready for a Zaltbommel Titanic moment, ya know?

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